Madman Diary

As the John Lennon sang:

“Another year over,

A new one just begun…”

As year 2006 became history,

New hope, new resolution, new goal are sets

Not to mention the must attend New Year eve party.

People crowding the hotspot witnessing the countdown,

Few looking back and examine their life,

Few looking forward to make a change in the future,

Few really think much,

Few really care… except the countdown, the atmosphere of the crowd,

The music that shaking everyone’s heads off,

The alcohol the stirring up the mind, the touch/hugging/kissing from the love that is both real to the flesh while comforting the mind.

And perhaps few don’t know what to think of but hoping something better will appear in their life…new hope, or new resolution, or new goal, new job or a new partner…

As the rooster crow during the first light in the morning,

The crowds cheer as the time is ticking.

But the crow mark another new day is coming,

The cheering unfortunately is mostly made for the sake of shouting (for fun?)

Happy New Year! Happy New Year!

Lucky for everyone, thanks to the holid… they only need to suffer the “Tuesday Blue”

Happy New Year! Happy New Year!

People complain are about the same: job dissatisfaction, relationship problem, money not enough, everything is not okay.

People starting the same routine again as they read the daily news:

“Which movie stars is having affair now? Which singer appears naked in their concert?

How many people die in the accident?

How many being robbed off of their possession or even their life?

Which politicians starting to weave another lie?

Why people raging war with each other?”

Laughing, or entertained, or sympathy, or hatred, or confused, or even some might shed their tea… but that come to an end when the final page of the newspaper flipped.

Back to reality, it’s time for us to cause others to Laugh/entertained/hatred/confused/cry…

Of course, that is inclusive of raging war against the enemies in your workplace.

As the biologist explain the how the organisms find their ideal partner to produce the better offspring/next generation.

Few can really explain why on the contrary, human kinds are becoming worsened throughout the generations.

People like to point fingers unto other while not able to take criticism themselves.

People like compliment as though their every move/action are worth to be nominated them a series of Nobel prizes.

We like everything that is spicy and nice but don’t dare to work for them.

Nowadays our hairstyles come in variety with the selection of color for display,

Clothing that promise to bring the best out of us…

Best resume that we can download online that guaranteed grabbing the attention of the our future employer,

Fantastic assignment from the anonymous sources which by hope or by crook might help the students passed their grade.

(Note: Good plagiarism required efforts too! Don’t just copy and paste the entire article! Remove the link (online) and edit the font! And last but not least, are you sure your English proficiency level is as good as the original sources? Sigh, nowadays people don’t even have the right attitude to plagiarized a work/college assignment.)

Except all of these, by looking the way the new generation behave, one had to wonder the authenticity of Charles Darwin’s theory of evolution.

While I was only started another of my sarcasms and complaining towards everything in this year just like everyone else, here I would like to dedicated this song to all my friends/enemies…By John Lennon:

So this is Christmas
And what have you done
Another year over
And a new one just begun
And so this is Christmas
I hope you have fun
The near and the dear one
The old and the young

A very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year
Let’s hope it’s a good one
Without any fear
And so this is Christmas
For weak and for strong
For rich and the poor ones
The world is so wrong
And so happy Christmas
For black and for white
For yellow and red ones
Let’s stop all the fight
A very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year
Let’s hope it’s a good one
Without any fear
And so this is Christmas
And what have we done
Another year over
And a new one just begun
And so this is Christmas
I hope you have fun
The near and the dear one
The old and the young
A very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year
Let’s hope it’s a good one
Without any fear
War is over
If you want it
War is over
Now…

Just as the madmen preparing to launch his "kamikaze" tactics to actualize his business plan, an unexpected twist (but yet desirable result) turn up as he received an sms someday sometime while doing something: he have been offered to become a part time educator at the tertiary education!

So there he is "educating" the young students at the institution ("I’m still young too!" the madmen said)

The young one starring at the madmen as he is a clown, and panic as they were listening to different tounge (language). But maybe the latter part is true as the madmen using English to communicate with the "Chinamen" in class.

Some students try to listen, some just being honest yawning just right in front of the madmen. And some trying to communicate with their own shadow or applying lipstick unto the their own shadow… hoping it can make themselves better.

Second week arrived in his teaching career and the madmen discovered that the institution or the students themselves are "madder" than him…a young lad have commit suicide!

The reason that made him take such a step? love? peer pressure? family? academic performance?

"HAhahahaha……" the friends of the madmen laugh as they heard this news, "it must be your fault lah! He must be cannot stand your teaching even for a day! Hahahaha……"

The madmen tyring to laugh at that……

But later ponder more about it……

Last month seems to be a really ambitious month, the madman idealistically anounced to the world (actually just my netwok of friends) that he is gonna quit his job, rent a room to have his own private workplace, and start his own business… and he is doing it this month.

Back to reality where the madman notice that the world is much more crazier and uncertain that he thought… the savings he thought can help him to survive a few months are not enough to alive for a month! sigh…but still able to spare a few ringgit to yum cha with my friends though…sigh~

So many things to do…so little time…many things have happend in this month so as the result of these, many things that he have planned had to be delay.

But fortunately as he is called the ‘madman’, therefore despite the "red alert" of his financial status..he continue to "mad" on his journey as he has planned, delayed better than none.

May the madman’s plan are in pleasant of the God’s eye.

Ladies and Gentleman, Tuan Tuan dan Puan Puan, rakan rakan sekalian, the Madman would like to take this opportunity to announce to every unfortunate soul that viewing this blog….that I’m gonna quit my current job as a fundraiser in May, and become an entrepreneur soon!

Yup, I’m one of the fella that somebody claimed to be crazy for not finding a proper job. One of those people that always like to daydream… one of those people that will tend to fail their business 60-70% for the first year, or then will fail 80-90% for the next five year.

for now, I’m still doing the research and hoping can finish the business plan before June. One of the many objective to announce this is because I want to attracted unwanted attention as to create unplesant prejudice to form some level of pressure to push me to move on to make this business idea of mine into a success

Lets hope the I’m doing it for the goods of everyone instead of creating wealth for my own. Lets hope it can glorify God instead of fulfilling my own desire of achieving something.

By the way, since I’m gonna quit my job at May…that also means I got plenty of time to lepak with my yum cha kaki liao!

After a long unemployment that last for almost 5 months, finally I got myself a job! A job that many people will tend to avoid, I might have myself a good laugh if I found any of my friends went to such job interview…and now her I am, doing it now, geeez, I’m such a weirdo, an I? haha~

Volunteer…Salesman…Conman…such job create a variety of perception among many people including my family and friends, I think i’m abit of eveything except the thrird one. in case you are curious, I’m now a fundraiser on behalf of WWF (World Wide Fund of Nature, Malaysia).

From Kindergarden to primary school, from secondary school to college, and now dwelling in the workforce have really allow me to experience many changes, especially friendship. When I was about 12 years old, I thought that friendship is neverchanging and eternal, but now, not only the friendship is fragile, there are even an unwanted rumors happend between me and a friend that I have rarely encounter! Pen (word) are mightier than sword? True indeed.

Anyway, fortunate enough there is still some yum cha kaki (friends) available, we don’t really commit much towards each other life, but perhaps that is the reason we still able to keep in touch with each other…as less communication means less conflict.

Am I a pessimist person and thinking too much? mentally yes, but not in action. But only those who really know me well will understand what kind of person I am. any friends who thought of knowing me well should know that I’m a complicated, double personality, liberal minded, sarcastic, business minded (creative), and a fella that thought he think like a philosopher…haha~ But above all, a person who tend to put God as first priority…can’t said a successful one, but nevertheless I’ll keep on trying.

A million thanks to those friends who have enough patient to befriend me, and some condolence to those friends gonna be (hehe), May God blessing shower us with blessing like the nice hot bathing shower water, lets sing our heart out while showering during bath time~ Cheers!

Recently some news and issue either internationally or those around me… those things have really drowned my mind completely as though I’m trying to express it here but I couldn’t (at least not now).

Suddenly I think of this song sung by Simon and Garfunkel, which in some way echoed the feeling within my heart, hope this meaningful song can enlighten all of you in some way:

The Sound of Silence

Hello darkness, my old friend,
I’ve come to talk with you again,
Because a vision softly creeping,
Left its seeds while I was sleeping,
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence.

In restless dreams I walked alone
Narrow streets of cobblestone,
‘Neath the halo of a street lamp,
I turned my collar to the cold and damp
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of a neon light
That split the night
And touched the sound of silence.

And in the naked light I saw
Ten thousand people, maybe more.
People talking without speaking,
People hearing without listening,
People writing songs that voices never share
And no one dare
Disturb the sound of silence.

"Fools" said I, "You do not know
Silence like a cancer grows.
Hear my words that I might teach you,
Take my arms that I might reach you."
But my words like silent raindrops fell,
And echoed
In the wells of silence

And the people bowed and prayed
To the neon god they made.
And the sign flashed out its warning,
In the words that it was forming.
And the sign said, "The words of the prophets
are written on the subway walls
And tenement halls."
And whisper’d in the sounds of silence.

Actually I have read this book a years ago… but just our of a sudden have a urge to recommend it to everyone (whoever that are surfing this blog

I like it because if offer alternative point of view towards science, unlike the mainstream that regard their theories as the truth (which for many centuries, many theories had been overthrown and overthrown…again and again)

But one particular point that i really like about this book is where the author relate our body to the body of Christ (Church)…the function of our skin and bones.

Some churches has stumbled many of those whom interested towards the truth because their message is too hard for the people to swallow. True, but hard to swallow.

While some other churches making the same mistake as to stumbled many as their message is merely consisted of "sugar-coated" content that is pleasant to hear by everyone.

The former churches acted as a crab that is using its cold and hard shell (bone) when coming to reach out to people which most of the people will feel repel, while the latter churches "touches" the people with its soft approaches (skin) but failing to enforce it with a strong spiritual foundation (bone). Both went to the extreme when coming to reach out.

How should any churches act? Well, just act as a real body does… we greet people with our nice smooth skin that is full of love, and make it a firm handshake with its bone. Wow, Body of Christ here doesn’t meant merely an organization, but a real living body! Not just an organization that consist of living human members… but those who are belong to the Body of Christ, as part of the living cells or tissues of the body! and each have their own distinctive and different role to perform!

Unfortunately, as far as the world is concerned… the Body of Christ seems not perfect… Churches/brothers/sisters attacking each other…the nose argue with the leg, the hand slapping the face, the brain insulting the heart…and the stories continue to go on as each of the part claiming that they themselves is the real Body of Christ.

Don’t we understand that each part of the body have their own role to perform…so that the Body of Christ can be perform perfectly? Some part (leg) are essential to step through the dirt and carry others to the destination, some part (hand) are responsible to greet and touches the world, some part (eye) are gifted with vision to see and guide the way, some part (brain) are to coordinate every movement and help to plan things.

How long should the Body of Christ remain cripple before it can even come to reach out to the world effectively?

Angel, the creatures whom almost everyone adores of,

Wearing their pure white robe,

Spreading their strong protective shield of wings,

They are everyone’s desire, everyone’s savior, everyone’s solution…

When man are facing difficulties, lonely, confuse, hopeless, weakening…

Their name will be mentioned: Oh, where is my guardian angel?

But what is the origin of angel?

How much do we know about them?

Is it simply a tool or fantasy to fulfill our own desire?

Just as young girls dreamt of being rescue by the prince charming from their castle of boredom,

Or some fella’s dreams’ of getting rich… by expecting bags of gold dropping from the sky? (blessing from angel?)

Human prefer to called their protector as their angel,

Some people idolized and worshipped angels,

Some Christians think that angels are exist mainly to serve them,

You calling Christians as angels, they might think you calling them slaves.

So, think twice whenever you come across any angels…

Satan was once the most beloved archangel of God,

Now he is the human’s favorite god in this world,

Why? Why he strays away from God one might ask…

Through word the world was made,

And Adam and Eve are made of clay,

Coming alive when God’s spirit enter their nostril,

Then there are creatures other than man that are unique in many ways,

The angels that made of fire instead of clay,

Satan is the head of the angels, and the most beloved angel in God’s eye.

One day, just as every lover will ask their partner to define their love…

God asks Satan and the other angels to bow before man, to both Adam and Eve.

Satan was stunned,

He felt uneasy,

He felt insulted,

He felt ridiculous… The angels, those that are made of the pure essence of elements of fire to worship those who are made of clay (or mud whatever you called them)?

And that is the story how Satan and other angels rebel against God,

And have we (those who claimed to choose the narrow road) acted as Satan and the other rebellious angels?

Not humble enough to serve and bow before the others who have not come to the light?

Or like Satan and his angels, thought that the other are unclean and deserved to be damned?

Judge not, and ye shall not be judge

Learn to serve and love others and lets the judgments in the hands of God, not us.

Now got the clearer pictures of the other side of some angels? So think twice…

Before you adoring them indiscriminately. 

And the most important lessons are… can we act as angels as they suppose to be…to humble one self and let go our ego to serve the others? Can we instead of acting as fire that always instruct others what is right or wrong…become clay… to allow others to step on us?Wow, love hurts isn’t it?

(By the way, ever heard of Chinese favorite’s god that is called “God of Prosperity”? The Chinese like him so much despite the true identity of him, that he was once a bad guy in Shang dynasty. “Jie Cai Shen” – welcoming the prosperity god? Think again… you might actually welcoming a bad fella entering your home please refer to Chinese well known novel that entitled “Feng Shen Bang” – Gods’ Nomination List.)

The caveman become madman,

As everyone embraces the darkness,

The people continue to enjoying their quality time with their love one,

Shadows which is their own reflection.

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Madman or caveman,

He doesn’t care much,

He continue his journey,

As hoping to find another travelers.

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Within the infinite darkness of the cave,

Such a joy as the madman discover,

Rare sights of people wandering…

Stepping over the virgin ground.

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Joy turn to horror as he discovered those travelers…

Setting up fire on those cave dwellers,

who doesn’t desire to follow their path,

The light that bring life become a killing tool as the blood moisture the shadows.

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The caveman could only watched and sigh…

As the innocent blood continue to be drew.

Now he started to understand,

Travelers they might be, a life taker instead of light seeker.

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The madman being angered and confused,

Is this light all about?

Eradicate those of the different path?

As the light vanished the shadow?

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The madman come out of the cave,

Crying as he stomping his fist on the plain,

Cursing towards the existence of light,

Bringing miserables to both him and cave dwellers.

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The soft wind gently comforting him,

The light of the stars sparkle above him,

Despite the madman’s cursing,

They continue to shine upon him lovingly and caring.

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The madman smile with a relief,

As he think he know now,

What did the light try to said to him,

and How did the light always there in him.

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Gazing one last moment at the sky,

Madman turn back and reentering the cave.

Continue to be rejected by the cave dweller,

Continue to plant light in their heart.

Standing at the edge of cliff,

Posing there for a sniff,

Gazing through the endless boundaries of the unknown land,

The madman decided to march on.

A small step to start a march, a big leap for his future…for better or worse (thank you Armstrong for your great word, and sorry to abuse it here)

Many wanders aimlessly along the way,

Some decided to settle down at the middle of nowhere,

Crazy enough as why he is called a madman, he become the few to march through the dessert, at the direction of the sunrise.

The flies surrounded the madman as they can smell the end of this madman,

Teasing him as to hope the madman fall earlier,

The madman continue to march on,

while the flies continue to tease and laugh at his pointless act.

Just as the worse has not come to its peak… Hyena join in the the bandwagon,

Joyously laughing behind the path of the madman,

Greedily licking the taste left from the his trace,

Though shaken, the mad man journey on.

Soon all hell break loose,

Snakes, scorpions, and other dark creatures are preparing their celebration,

A great feast they expecting, once the madman fall,

Amazingly, the mind of the madman overpower its over-exhausted physical body,

As if the madman will continue to move, even if the skeleton is all it is.

The sun continue to lead the madman to his direction,

Traces of the pioneer giving him hope,

He continue to march, and march… and more and more creatures continue to following him.